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JAMES 1:19-20 “WHEREFORE, MY BELOVED BRETHREN, LET EVERY MAN BE SWIFT TO HEAR, SLOW TO SPEAK, SLOW TO WRATH. FOR THE WRATH OF MAN WORKETH NOT THE RIGHTEOUSNESS OF GOD.” (KJV)
“So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” (NKJV)
“This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.” (NASB, RSV)
“Ye know this, by beloved brethren. But let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: for the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.” (ASV)
“Dear brothers, don’t ever forget that it is best to listen much, speak little, and not become angry, for anger doesn’t make us good, as God demands that we must be.” (TLB)
“My dear brothers, take not of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.” (NIV)
Another brilliantly organized “three point” sermon from the Word. Hear swiftly, be slow to speak and even slower to wrath. I have to admit, however, that the biggest reason I memorized this verse is because it speaks so directly to me. I tend to not listen very well, speak quickly, often and loudly, and have yet to completely control my anger. Humph!
One other point here: You can get “credit” for two verses memorized here if you memorize both verse 19 and 20. And honestly, we need to memorize them both.
Point 1: Be swift to hear. Especially as men, we have to admit that we do not listen well. Some of us do not listen at all! James tells us, don’t just listen…HEAR! And even more, “Be swift to hear.”
Men, ask your wife how much you actually listen. I haven’t been to a marriage seminar yet where the need for us to listen better isn’t strongly stressed. That is because we have built into us genetically the inability to listen. Regularly, our wives start telling us what’s on their minds and we rapidly give them the answer they are obviously looking for. Men are “solvers.” “I know you want the answer, here it is!”
Every counselor tells us that after our wives pour out their hearts to us, it would be wise for us to say something like, “now, what I hear you saying is…”, followed by what we thought we heard. I’ve gotten this wrong more times than I have gotten it right because, honestly, I don’t listen well and I am NOT swift to hear.
The implication of the instruction here is that before we rapidly rush into anything else, just stop, listen and hear what is being said. This takes practice! It takes patience. Sometimes, the “hearing” means not just what the words described but what is really being said in the context of the words. No wonder it is hard!
Go ahead men. Rush right in there. Don’t speak. Swiftly, purposely, HEAR! Some eye contact might be helpful. The other person’s mannerisms, mood, facial expressions, hand gestures might be actually saying more than the actual words. Listen to hear. Take your time doing it. Maybe delay your immediate response. Possibly show some thought before you speak. That brings us to what James says we should do next.
Point 2: Be slow to speak. It doesn’t mean speak slowly, although sometimes that helps. It means, give some thought, reflect on what is really being said, save some of your opinions in favor of speaking to the real issue. Think before you speak. Don’t speak at all if that is the best option.
I have to admit, I am terrible at this. The real reason is, just like most of us men, I know I have the answers to your problems! Let me tell you, help you understand and maybe fix it for you. Far more often, the other person is really more interested that you heard them than they are that you have their answer. I know, again, this is true in most marriages.
Sometimes, the best listeners become the best speakers because they pause long enough to provide the speech that is most helpful, not necessarily the one that gives the “obvious” answer. Listening really well can often lead the listener to understand that the real problem is way beyond what the other person actually described. Stop. Think for a minute. Instead of the obvious answer, what does this person actually want or need to hear to actually bring resolution and peace of mind?
Point 3: Be slow to wrath. I am a red head. Actually, the hair is all white now, but it is still pretty red inside my head. And everything you have heard about us is true…we are quick to wrath or anger. I have spent a lifetime attempting to bring that part of my personality under complete control. Maybe in heaven. But this is the third reason I committed James 1:19-20 to memory a long time ago. I need to be reminded every bit of it. Be slow to anger or wrath.
I added memorizing verse 20 as well because I need to be reminded that I cannot work God’s righteousness in me if I am swift to wrath…quick to rush into anger. Again, the solution is to stop, wait, think about it, focus on Christ-likeness, put David-likeness to death and to not be angry. Getting angry about it (whatever “it” is) has never solved whatever the issue was and, more often than not, has gotten me into trouble I didn’t need to bring on myself in the first place.
Christ in me means I need to be swift to hear, slow to speak and even slower to anger. As a great speaker says, “you think about that!” More importantly, memorize this one! When tempted to do the reverse of what the Scripture tells us, remind yourself what that Word says. Bring that truth to life, not what we are more likely to do.
Questions to ponder: What is it about our human nature that makes us so easy to upset? I know we are not all that way. So, why are some of us easier in nature and temperament than I am? How can I become that way. Our faulty hearing, speaking and anger are ever-present demonstrations of the flesh, still alive and well in us. What does the Scripture tell us to do with the flesh? What is it that makes winning an argument so pleasurable? Is it possible that we can say far more by actually not saying anything than we can by speaking right up and letting everyone know what we think? What avenues of our lives most exhibit the bad side of these characteristics (other than obviously our marriage)? Name five people who are well known for their ability to hear well and speak wisely. Seems like those qualities go against everything our culture teaches us. Has “counting to ten” ever worked to make you slow to wrath? Have you ever seen the technique of saying, “What I heard you say was….” work well?
Other Texts/Scriptures to examine and study: Matthw 10:19; Mark 13:11; Proverbs 17:1; Isaiah 30:15 “…in quietness and confidence shall be your strength.”; Luke 21:19 “In your patience possess ye your souls.”; Matthew 6:7 “…they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking.”
 
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